I think the hardest challenge I am facing right now, as the arrival of our second child rapidly approaches, is letting our first baby go. I don't feel ready for it...at all. When I think about Mads not being the baby anymore...I cry a little inside (or maybe a lot). On those random nights that Mads lets me rock and cuddle her before I plop her into bed, I get super weepy when I'm reminded that those moments are fleeting. Yeh, I know. We will still cuddle and there will still be those special times when it'll just be her and I...when we can share special little moments. I know. Still. It'll be different!
Different isn't bad, of course. It's just....different. It'll be a big change. Moo will no longer be the primary receiver of our attention and affections. She will have to move on over and share the love...which I am almost 99.9% sure she will greet with a bit of resistance at first (maybe not, but I have a feeling). I am hoping and praying she doesn't have a tough time with it all, because my mama heart will just break into pieces.
I'm definitely over-thinking it all, as I do with most things. grr. Mads will be just fine. There will be some tantrums and bad days, but she'll do great. I'm sure she'll naturally take over that big sis role...and love it. I personally didn't mind bossing around my 5 younger siblings ;). Having been the oldest though, I know how hard it can be...and I think that's why I am feeling a bit of extra sadness for our Mads girl right now. Her small little world where she is THE ONLY ONE...the primary focus...is about to disappear. *sniff* That makes me so sad! Why does it make me so sad?? *sigh*
Everything will be okay. I know that it will.
Life will go on...baby boy will arrive, we'll transition, make changes and all end up being happier because of it. I know that's true.
Right now it's just hard to accept...
I've got to let our baby grow up.
(in a couple of months!!! She's still my baby now. So there. :)
I don't know a mother of more than one who hasn't dealt with this. From the other side, I can say that giving your child a sibling is much better than raising her as an only. The transition may be hard, but she will be glad to have him. I promise!
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like we are due around the same time (my due date is feb. 1) - we have an almost three year old girl and are expecting a boy as well. I was totally happy with either a girl or a boy but now that I know we are having a boy I am thinking/hoping the difference in sex will help make this transition a little easier...baby brother won't be wearing any of G's clothes, for instance...I'm sad that she loses her only child status but so, so happy she will have someone to grow up with. Of course, pregnancy doesn't make any of these emotions easier to reason with...
ReplyDeleteI felt the same way when I was pregnant with my second child, and the one thing that always helped was remembering that my son had a good 3 years where he was the only child. He received all of our attention for 3 years, and my second child would never have that (don't think too hard about that part because it can make you sad too!). No matter how he adjusted to the new baby, I felt good about the fact that we had such a special bond. Now that my second child is 3 1/2, I know that his sister is the best thing that could have happened to my son, and watching the two kids together is (usually) enough to melt my heart.
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