Here's my 2cents. :) I don't remember a lot about the months before I was pregnant with #2 (it's all such a blur), but I can relate a lot to your feelings because that's how I was before baby #3. I had mild PPD after #2 and was really nervous about dealing with that while having three babes to take care of.
So my husband and family rallied around me and came up with a plan. Pretty much, my husband was on watch. If he could see I was floundering, he would call my mom and we would plan so she could take the boys for a weekend, or we'd all go to her house for a change of pace. She also called daily for the first few weeks to check in.
So that's my advice. Be honest with the ones you love and set up a plan. It's pure craziness, but it's so worth it!
That's so funny you're thinking of this right now too. I am thinking about it all the time. I want a sibling for Lillian SO BADLY, but I'm terrified as well. I'm terrified of delivery/recovery again (I did it all naturally but tore pretty badly so recovery was BAD), not to mention I think the newborn phase is really hard, too. I am so torn. I really want a second child. But I'm so scared!! I guess I'll give myself a bit more time to think about it/pray about it. You'll have to keep us posted what you decide!
I too and going through the same struggle. I am excited at the thought of baby #2, but scared as well. You can still do a lot of stuff with 1 child, but 2... well that will be a lot tougher... So should I wait a little longer? I also feel that Eli is so little right now (he's 7 months, I think your daughter is 9?) and I feel like I want him to have 100% of my attention, but maybe in a year he won't want that anymore... so maybe wait a little longer to try again?! I don't know if you relate to any of this or not, but at least you know someone else there is struggling with the same thought process! I think we just need to trust our gut, and wait til the timing seems right. After all, I guess it's really GOD'S plan, not our own... So we just need to keep listening and be open to it, right?
Your thoughts are mine...I would feel awful if most of my attention had to be directed away from Moo. I do know that life would move on though and soon she would appreciate her sibling. YES, going out with 2? AHHH. I mean, is it even possible? LOL. Those thoughts make me anxious.
I am just trying to remember that all things happen when they should and that God only gives me what I can handle (maybe not what I think I can handle haha).
I didn't want to be all "I'm a mom of 2 and I know exactly what to tell you about having your second child!" - you know, the preachy one who tells you exactly how it will be and what timeline you should follow, etc. etc. But after watching your video blogpost last night, I had to go ahead and chime in this morning. This post is for you!!: http://allthingsgale.blogspot.com/2012/01/on-siblings.html
Hmmm...I got pregnant with #2 when my first was around 8 months. I'm not going to lie, but I wish I had waited till my first was a year before having another (now of course that I have my 2nd son I wouldn't trade him or anything, just want to be honest). I was SO sick the first few months and that was really hard to deal with with a baby under a year. Luckily, my 1st son was really independent and early developmental wise so he was walking, out of a crib and mostly potty trained by the time I had my second. I think the biggest thing, is that the first child is walking because there's no way you can carry two. I will also say it was much harder of a transition from 1 to 2 kids than 2 to 3. Be prepared that you will be much more limited in getting out with two. All that being said, I think a 2nd would be great when you're ready because siblings are amazing! :)
That is something else I think about...feeling pregnancy sickness with a little one who still needs full attention (almost). When was pregnant with Moo I could take all the time I wanted for myself.
ohhh that's so exciting! i say go for it!! but i'm not so rational all the time :) sending lots of love and peace along your jouney to baby #2! xoxo maria <3
So glad to have found you through VB too! I had 3 little ones in 3.5 years. Our second was not planned and she arrived 15 months after our first. I will say that going from 1 to 2 was a bit more of an adjustment because each parent will always be "on"- HOWEVER- I enjoyed my newborn phase with my second daughter more because I was less anxious, less worried and could sit back and totally enjoy the ride! Do it when you are ready- my friends who waited 3 or 4 years until having their second swear it's the route to go. My first year with two in 15 months was really, really hard- but now my girls are 3 and 4 and are the best of friends! They play so much and now entertain my 10 month old son who adores his sisters. Regardless of how you do it, you will adjust and make it work! Also any phase that is challenging (morning sickness, newborn not sleeping, sibling jealousy, etc only lasts for a short time- It feels long when you are in the phase, but when you look back, it doesn't seem as bad as it felt at the time! Good luck! xxoo Tracy
I love what all these other ladies had to say regarding more babies. They all are so right. No matter what you'll get it and get into your grove of things:)
What an exciting and nerve racking idea!
ReplyDeleteHere's my 2cents. :) I don't remember a lot about the months before I was pregnant with #2 (it's all such a blur), but I can relate a lot to your feelings because that's how I was before baby #3. I had mild PPD after #2 and was really nervous about dealing with that while having three babes to take care of.
ReplyDeleteSo my husband and family rallied around me and came up with a plan. Pretty much, my husband was on watch. If he could see I was floundering, he would call my mom and we would plan so she could take the boys for a weekend, or we'd all go to her house for a change of pace. She also called daily for the first few weeks to check in.
So that's my advice. Be honest with the ones you love and set up a plan. It's pure craziness, but it's so worth it!
Very good to remember...making a plan...and making sure I am not losing it.
DeleteThanks for that!
That's so funny you're thinking of this right now too. I am thinking about it all the time. I want a sibling for Lillian SO BADLY, but I'm terrified as well. I'm terrified of delivery/recovery again (I did it all naturally but tore pretty badly so recovery was BAD), not to mention I think the newborn phase is really hard, too. I am so torn. I really want a second child. But I'm so scared!! I guess I'll give myself a bit more time to think about it/pray about it. You'll have to keep us posted what you decide!
ReplyDeleteYes! Recovery was harder than expected. My body was just done. DONE. It needed rest and couldn't really get it (except in bits and pieces).
DeleteI personally LOVE the 4 month on stage :D. Newborns are loverly and cute, but wwwoooooooooo it is difficult.
Camille,
ReplyDeleteI too and going through the same struggle. I am excited at the thought of baby #2, but scared as well. You can still do a lot of stuff with 1 child, but 2... well that will be a lot tougher... So should I wait a little longer? I also feel that Eli is so little right now (he's 7 months, I think your daughter is 9?) and I feel like I want him to have 100% of my attention, but maybe in a year he won't want that anymore... so maybe wait a little longer to try again?! I don't know if you relate to any of this or not, but at least you know someone else there is struggling with the same thought process! I think we just need to trust our gut, and wait til the timing seems right. After all, I guess it's really GOD'S plan, not our own... So we just need to keep listening and be open to it, right?
Your thoughts are mine...I would feel awful if most of my attention had to be directed away from Moo. I do know that life would move on though and soon she would appreciate her sibling. YES, going out with 2? AHHH. I mean, is it even possible? LOL. Those thoughts make me anxious.
DeleteI am just trying to remember that all things happen when they should and that God only gives me what I can handle (maybe not what I think I can handle haha).
Thanks for your input!!!!
I didn't want to be all "I'm a mom of 2 and I know exactly what to tell you about having your second child!" - you know, the preachy one who tells you exactly how it will be and what timeline you should follow, etc. etc. But after watching your video blogpost last night, I had to go ahead and chime in this morning. This post is for you!!: http://allthingsgale.blogspot.com/2012/01/on-siblings.html
ReplyDeleteHmmm...I got pregnant with #2 when my first was around 8 months. I'm not going to lie, but I wish I had waited till my first was a year before having another (now of course that I have my 2nd son I wouldn't trade him or anything, just want to be honest). I was SO sick the first few months and that was really hard to deal with with a baby under a year. Luckily, my 1st son was really independent and early developmental wise so he was walking, out of a crib and mostly potty trained by the time I had my second. I think the biggest thing, is that the first child is walking because there's no way you can carry two. I will also say it was much harder of a transition from 1 to 2 kids than 2 to 3. Be prepared that you will be much more limited in getting out with two. All that being said, I think a 2nd would be great when you're ready because siblings are amazing! :)
ReplyDeleteThat is something else I think about...feeling pregnancy sickness with a little one who still needs full attention (almost). When was pregnant with Moo I could take all the time I wanted for myself.
DeleteI guess you just do it though and that's that!
Thanks for your input, Marjorie.
ohhh that's so exciting! i say go for it!! but i'm not so rational all the time :)
ReplyDeletesending lots of love and peace along your jouney to baby #2!
xoxo
maria <3
So glad to have found you through VB too! I had 3 little ones in 3.5 years. Our second was not planned and she arrived 15 months after our first. I will say that going from 1 to 2 was a bit more of an adjustment because each parent will always be "on"- HOWEVER- I enjoyed my newborn phase with my second daughter more because I was less anxious, less worried and could sit back and totally enjoy the ride! Do it when you are ready- my friends who waited 3 or 4 years until having their second swear it's the route to go. My first year with two in 15 months was really, really hard- but now my girls are 3 and 4 and are the best of friends! They play so much and now entertain my 10 month old son who adores his sisters. Regardless of how you do it, you will adjust and make it work! Also any phase that is challenging (morning sickness, newborn not sleeping, sibling jealousy, etc only lasts for a short time- It feels long when you are in the phase, but when you look back, it doesn't seem as bad as it felt at the time! Good luck! xxoo Tracy
ReplyDeleteI love what all these other ladies had to say regarding more babies. They all are so right. No matter what you'll get it and get into your grove of things:)
ReplyDelete